Relationships and Sex: Prefer your bromance to your romantic relationship? You're not alone

A new study found guys are sharing more with their bros than with their girlfriends.

You’ve heard of bromances. You probably even have one going. The guy you do everything with and tell everything to? Yep, that’s a bromance, and it's a beautiful thing.

It's so beautiful, in fact, that according to new research, you’re probably getting more satisfaction from them than from romantic relationships. Allow us to explain.

The small-scale study, published in Men and Masculinities, looked at 30 heterosexual guys who were either currently in relationships or had been before. When the study’s authors interviewed them, they found that each one of them had at least one bromance in which they shared essentially all aspects of their life.

“We are basically like a couple...we get called, like, husband and wife all the time,” one man said of his bromance, according to the study.

Another participant felt the same way: “It’s your best friend. You are closer to him than anyone. They are like a guy girlfriend.”

So it’s no surprise that the study’s authors suggest that too much investment in a bromance may not leave enough time for romance.

“Where bromances fulfill many of the romantic elements of traditional heterosexual relationships—emotional disclosure, intimacy, and dependency—the social need for early romantic attachment at least is being challenged by young men’s behaviors and attitudes today,” Stefan Robinson, Ph.D., one of the study’s three authors, told Men's Health.

When asked about the differences between bromances and romances, a majority of the study’s participants said that sex was the only thing that came to mind. And 28 out of 30 said they would rather discuss personal matters with their closest guy friend as opposed to their girlfriend, which doesn't sound like it would bode well for the health of a romantic relationship.

“If I found a lump on my testical, I’d talk to [bromance] rather than my girlfriend,” one participant said in the study.

Another talked about a time where he was upset about his grandfather and preferred the company of his bromantic partner rather than his girlfriend at the time.

“I didn’t want her to see me upset. Stewart kept me company, and I think it pissed her off,” he said. “Stewart stayed in my bed till the morning.”

Of the 30 men interviewed, 29 said cuddling in the same bed occurred frequently with their bromances.

“I think most guys in bromances cuddle, it’s a usual in my main friendship group. It’s not a sexual thing, either. It shows you care,” one participant said.

Robinson said there are definite benefits from close same-sex friendships, including that they have a positive impact on mental health. But what’s most interesting to him is whether or not bromances will affect future living situations, marital statuses, and even the ability to socialize with women.

“But most importantly,” Robinson says, “whether men prefer friendship or romance with men or women, each sex should still be afforded respect, because they are much more similar than we might think.”

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