Dear Senior Opupulepu,
How are you do? As for me and my family we are do fine.
Senior, the presentation below is what happened at the recruiting grounds of our bow and arrow professionals’ day-care centre.
Senior, the forces sergeant major, stood up and after saluting his elders and the paraded proceeded to address a group of akupas and daughters of Eve who had spent three hundred moons training and hoping against hope to one day become bow and arrow professionals.
Senior, the hour had come and those who would hear their names would be those to be recruited. The forces sergeant major cleared his throat and said: “When you hear your name, shout “present sir” or simply “present”. Those who hear their names must move to the right. Those who do not hear their names must go home in peace and try their luck next time. When they go back to the civilian world, they must not use what they learnt here to settle scores or else, hmmmmm, harrrrrrrr, yooooo.
Senior, he begun: “Do U C Mamajulor (present sir!); Baba Tule (present!) Baba Liba Soja (present sir!); Anyigbala Hodzo (present!); Afortolanya (present sir!); Kwasiabi Nti (present sir!); Atta Kpakpo Gbemi (yes sa, saa!) Atta Kpakpo Gbemi (sorry, present sir!) Akpatsa Kokuee (present sir!)…. Anamon Tintin (present!) Obe Nyasani (present sir!).
Senior, at long last, the forces sergeant major finished the list and those whose names were mentioned leapt in jubilation and celebration for they were not slapped for nothing; they did not eat lizards and snakes for nothing; they did not sleep with a sky full of stars as their roof. But as for those whose names did not appear on the list, they had to accept things like that. It was all part of human life. They will go and come again tomorrow.
Senior, but not all would go away easily. Some were not understand how they were left out. There were those who sacrificed day and night to make sure that the kingmakers chose our Omanhene to be paramount chief. Some of these had to buy ogyateshie which was distilled in Bubuashie, packaged in Kaneshie, wholesaled in Teshie and retailed in Agbogbloshie, for the boys-boys and path ways with some generous amount of cowries for the daughters of Eve. All in the name of the clan winning the lot casting.
Senior, they demanded answers and would not look the other way until answers were provided.
Senior it did not take long when they listened and disbelieved the origin of their problems. A certain aplanke of the Omanhene who was the kingsize human type writer at village’s playing cards centre, one Professor (not the Zoom-Zoom) spoke and said that from today, tomorrow to go, no one from the Elephant clan should be given job.
Senior, this Professor (not the Zoom-Zoom) said according from our Omanhene the Elephants have been chopping saaaa and are becoming too obese for the good of their health. So in order to have pure neutralization in Ogyakrom, they should come and sit down small for others to also chop small.
Senior, the whole of Ogyakrom was thrown into the state of confusion with some saying the Omanhene can say such a thing like this while others swore that if indeed he said that then it was just a slip of tongue.
Senior, quickly someone decided to measure the weight and size of the Elephants and was surprised to find out that while only twenty-four were actually overweight, the rest who numbered like fifty million were as skinny as a deer in the dry season.
Senior, whenever there is parade attention, these twenty-four overweight elephants would stand up and block the others. So that no one sees the true size of all members of the clan.
Senior, so after all the Omanhene is not seeing clearly because dark clouds have crowded his sight. But the old man still insists to this day that he has sent goodies down to all and sundry, sundry and all members of the clan.
Senior, it happened that those elders who such opportunities came to, sold them to family and friends from the opposition clans without the knowledge of the true members of the Elephant clan.
Senior, the akupas and daughters of Eve of our Omanhene’s family and clan have sworn that otsina bioo tomorrow will they ever sacrifice for the family.
Senior, meanwhile some senior members of the Elephant clan have descended on this Professor (not the Zoom-Zoom) and are all over saying that he is such an unwise person. Short of admitting that our Omanhene said what he said he said, these people are saying the Professor (not the Zoom-Zoom) should have applied home-training before disclosing what Nana Onsurowuo said.
Senior, they are saying he should have bath the words well, well and applied lots of make-up on them before presenting them in public.
Senior, it is like saying things like this, poo-pooing when you actually want to say someone is offloading toxic waste from inside his inside. This one the Misimisi clan will prefer something like leaving your leg behind. With a word like engaging of two opposite sexes on a trip to Suhum-Nsawam, one would be expected to say they are making love.
Senior, meanwhile, the whole of Ogyakrom is waiting for our Omanhene to address the village in his “Fellow Garians” lectures when they are sure he will shelf matters arising from the conduct and behaviour of Kobby Nanti and address the issue of why he thinks the Elephants are over eating while millions have been found to be underfed like people in concentration camps.Senior, as for me I am Dan, sorry I am Done. Its Me.
Letter To Senior Opupulepu
Letter to Senior Opupulepu (143) Job Allocation According From Nana Onsurowuo
Letter To Senior Opupulepu
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